Let's face the fact that everyone prefers shortcuts. People like it when they get everything quite easy, including work, money, and relationships. Many people often take the latter for granted, not realizing that the relationship is something they should carefully work on. If you do not do that, you can fall into the trap of "lazy" relationships, which just exist instead of flourishing and making both partners happy. Try to answer honestly, how are things going in your life? You might date someone, or you have been married for several years. It’s no big deal.
More importantly, how much your feelings are sincere, and whether you are ready to get to know them better and accept as they are. You cannot leave anything to chance because otherwise, one day you will understand that your relationship has become “lazy” and no longer brings joy. Therefore, it is important not to lose the emotional component as well as remember about questions to ask in a relationship.
10 Questions to Ask in a New Relationship
When you start a new relationship, you believe that everything will surely be great, and you will be happy together just because you have matched on Tinder. However, your expectations can much differ from reality, and you still need to ask relationships questions to avert a breakup.
1. What are your best and worst traits?
When you just start dating, it is necessary to find out what your partner thinks about themselves, how they perceive themselves and what moments make them feel embarrassed. This question will show the level of their confidence and other things, which you can improve together.
2. What makes you different from other girls?
Girls like to show that they are better than the rest, and you have made the right choice. Answering this question, she might draw a picture of a perfect woman, and she will try to do her best to correspond to the image. Thus, you will get the best version of your girlfriend when she levels up her skills.
3. Do you like to experiment and try something new?
The answer will show you who is in front of you: an old-school devotee or a trailbreaker. You will be able to compare your answers and decide whether there is a reason to plan a common future or you are too different. Can you live without experiments and a desire to try all the positions of the Kamasutra?
4. What is the main drawback of a long-term relationship?
Do you plan to live the whole life with this person, or you perceive this relationship as a one-night stand with a temporary “prolongation of the subscription”? If the answer has sexual innuendo, and you don’t share this opinion, then it can become a real issue over time. It’s better to find out these moments from the get-go in order not to regret the wasted time.
5. What do you like more: beard, bristle or smooth-shaven face?
Tastes differ, and your girlfriend may not like your hipster beard. Of course, you can do everything you want with your body, but one day you might decide to please her, for example, with a smooth-shaven face. It’s better to know such things when you have just started dating.
6. Are you usually guided by emotions or mind?
It is necessary to know whether your girlfriend is a passionate person who can do something without thinking or she always has a clear mind, and potentially, you can rely on her in some extreme situation. Besides, if she is guided by the mind, you can be sure that she has thought things through, and you will hardly be able to persuade her. It’s necessary to be aware of such things in advance.
7. What do you like more: to touch, to listen or to watch?
In other words, you should try to find out whether your partner is a visual girl, or she is an auditory or tactile learner. This information will help you understand what she likes most both in everyday life and in a sexual one. Besides, it will be much easy to find a perfect present if you have found out what group your beloved one belongs to.
8. What situation can make you lose your temper?
If you haven’t been living together for many years, then you might not have faced a situation when your sweetheart turns into a fury because of a dirty dish or unfulfilled promise. You should be aware of things, which can make her show an unpleasant side of her nature in order to prevent them beforehand.
9. What phobias do you have and what are you afraid of?
There is a strict list of things, you should be aware of in advance not to find yourself in an awkward situation, looking like a fool. Girl’s phobias are on this list. Just imagine a situation: you decide to scare your girlfriend jokingly, but you have hit the mark, choosing her phobia the object of your stupid joke. Of course, you haven't meant to do that, but it doesn’t matter. This is one of the relationship questions you should ask in advance.
10. What is the brightest moment of your childhood?
Your past affects the present this or that way, so it will not be superfluous to find out the happiest moments of your partner’s childhood. For example, you might be able to use this information in the future, preparing a surprise.
5 Questions about Trust in Relationships
Trust is one of the pillars of a healthy relationship. If you don’t trust each other, you will not be able to live in harmony. So, if you see that you have had trust issues, don’t hesitate to ask the following 5 questions and solve them as soon as possible.
1. Will you be able to forgive cheating?
If you haven’t married yet, it’s high time to find out your partner’s opinion about cheating. If you think that everybody will have a negative reaction, then you are wrong. Many people practice open relationship, and they just don’t perceive sex with another person as cheating.
2. Do you want to know something about my ex-relationship?
If you love each other, you shouldn’t build a wall between you. So, you can directly ask your partner whether they want to know something about your past or not. Your girlfriend might ask about the reason for your last breakup, that’s it.
3. Will you tell me if something’s bothering you?
A rare girl will tell you directly what’s wrong when it is about your couple. Nonetheless, it is one of the questions to ask a girlfriend about your relationship. It might touch the spot one day, and your girlfriend will pull herself together and explain everything. The best way to deal with a misunderstanding is to have a heart-to-heart talk.
4. What will you do in the case of unexpected pregnancy?
It is one of the dicey questions to ask a girl about relationships. However, your girlfriend is not the only person who should answer it. This question shows how serious you are about your relationship. If you are not ready to be responsible for your actions, what committed relationship can it be about?
5. Do you trust me?
Actually, this is one of the most serious relationship questions. If both of you don’t trust each other at least in something, then it is not about healthy relationships. Trust issues are a red flag, which will not allow you to move further and will lead to a breakup.
15 Questions About Love and Relationships
You shouldn’t tuck away all the arising problems deep down inside, but you should solve them together. These questions will help save the relationship.
1. Can I make our life a little bit better?
This question will encourage a loved one to tell about their desires. Maybe, your girlfriend just wants pancakes on a Saturday morning. Show sincere interest in the secret desires of the partner, and you will be able to strengthen your relationship.
2. Have I done anything unpleasant?
It is best to discuss the negative moments as they appear, rather than close your eyes to what you don’t like. Having discussed the current situation, having heard and forgiven each other, you can be sure that the conflict will never grow to a universal scale.
3. Do you like our sex life?
Intimate problems directly affect the development of relationships, so you should talk about them. Talks about sex will raise your feelings to a higher level. If your loved one is embarrassed by such topics, try to start a more delicate discussion of these issues.
4. How can I help you?
Don’t hesitate to ask what is happening in your partner’s life and always share your personal experiences with them. It will be easier to find a way out of any situation, and mutual support gives confidence in your own strength.
5. Are we close enough?
There are no identical days. Support each other and be interested in the emotional state of your soulmate, and it will make your relationship more trusting and deeper.
6. Is there something that you cannot discuss with me?
In healthy relationships, you are never forced to doubt your sanity, competence, and knowledge. And if your partner doesn’t want to discuss anything with you, it may be a red flag that you have done something wrong. This is one of the deep questions ask relationship if you want to change your life for the better.
7. What should I do when you come home from work?
Your girlfriend may want something that you will never guess. She might need a little rest and half an hour of absolute silence. Complying with this request, you are a few steps closer to understanding her inner world. Besides, a happy woman is more likely to heed your own wishes.
8. Is there something that can make you feel more beloved?
It can be about physical intimacy that she lacks. Maybe she loves when you play with her hair or she likes it when you walk up behind her and kiss her on the neck. Small things create the whole picture, so don’t ignore such a simple way to make your beloved one a little bit happier every day.
9. Do you have experiences, which make you feel stressed? Can I help you deal with them?
The answer to this one of the important relationship questions will provide an opportunity to understand what problems your partner faces. This may be unpleasant for both of you, but otherwise, you will not be able to understand and help them. You can rephrase the question to make it sound softer and more appropriate.
10. Do my habits annoy you?
If you don’t have bad habits, it doesn’t mean that your behavior cannot annoy your girlfriend. For example, you get used to eating an apple when you watch a movie, but you do that so noisily that sometimes, it’s difficult to listen to the actors. When you are aware of such things, you are able to deal with them and keep the atmosphere peaceful.
11. Do you want to make love in an unusual place?
It is necessary to ask sexual questions about a relationship from time to time if you want to completely satisfy your partner, of course. If you believe that your girlfriend likes a “classic version,” then you can be much surprised, having learned about her sexual fantasies.
12. If you had a chance to wish for three things, what would it be?
If the answer to this question has more down to earth character, you will be able to use this information in the future. It’s always great to have a silver bullet when you have no idea what anniversary present you should better choose, especially if your capacities are not limited.
13. What does your perfect date look like?
Even if you have been married for many years, this is not an excuse to forget about dates. You know, when nothing brings joy, and both of you need a reload, a perfect date scenario can become a real lifeline. So, don’t hesitate to ask your beloved one about her vision of an ideal date.
14. How do you see your life in 5, 10, 15 years?
Your common future is one of the relationship questions to ask a girl. You might have already thought about the plans for the nearest and far future. And it would be very useful to ask the girl about the same. Do your plans coincide? Do you stare off in the same direction? If you are going to have a long-term relationship, you should know your partner’s opinion in this regard.
15. What does happiness mean to you?
Some things have a great influence on our lives, but they don’t have a physical component. Happiness belongs to such things, and it is a very important part of any healthy relationship. What does this emotion mean to you? Does your partner share your view? This is one of the things both partners should work on.