Almost every man had a woman in his life who left an indelible mark on his soul. Some men, having lost such women, look for replacement for the rest of their lives. Yes, this is a deep trauma. As a rule, a breakup is a painful process for two people. But how to cope with a breakup? Use our tips how to relieve a breakup.
1. Free yourself from negative emotions
The first thing you have to do is to free your mind and soul from negative emotions. Regardless of what you feel now, you need to let it all go - the suppressed emotions are bad for mental and physical health. Cry if you are hurt, talk to someone or tell your ex-partner everything that you feel - you need to talk. If you feel aggression - it is also important to get rid of it. You can do sports, beat a punching bag and so on.
2. Tell your friends everything
Can’t you relieve a breakup alone? Do you need a public? Call your trusted friend and tell him/her everything. And the more detailes, the better. What she did, how she acted, why she betrayed, remember even the smallest details. Go back through old memories, but this is the last time you do it.
3. Work as much as possible
It's no secret that is much more difficult to distract a man from his favorite work than a woman. So take advantage of this and devote the time to important things instead of sitting in front of a TV set and feel sad. After doing one thing, relax and move on to the next one. Nowadays, many people say that work can’t help a person cope with a breakup. However, if you look closely, you can find that the majority of those who say this are women. The advantages of work are undeniable - it takes all your time and you are unable to think about anything else.
4. Change your point of view
A painful breakup can be less unpleasant if you look at what is happening from a different angle. Don’t think that your personal life was defeated, you were left alone, underwent meanness and betrayal, and so on. Let's look more optimistically at the situation – you’ve become a free person and can do whatever you want, you have plenty of time for yourself and now there are doors for new more interesting, strong, and passionate relationships in your life.
5. Get rid of the past
Accept the situation dealing with a breakup - the past will not return to your life. Now you are a new person who is not the "half" of the partner who left you. Therefore, stop associating yourself with it. Get rid of everything that brings painful memories - photos, gifts or any other things. Burn your past - do it completely, irrevocably and don’t try to resurrect what already died.
6. Believe in yourself
Quite often, a breakup is combined with a decrease of self-esteem, especially if a girl left you, not you did it. Therefore, it is necessary to protect yourself and work on your own self-esteem. You must learn for yourself - you were left not because something is wrong with you. No. Your relationship has stopped because you have exhausted yourself, and a partner doesn’t have more strength to give you love - the reason is not in you. Believe in yourself, find the strength to prove to yourself that you are the best. Buy new clothes, change your style, write down the list of your advantages and hang them in the most prominent place. This will help you regain confidence in your uniqueness and attractiveness.
7. Communicate with other girls
Many people are obsessed with their partner being in a relationship and they stop noticing beautiful and intelligent women that surround them because of this. Communicate and discover the world of people again. Find new friends, or even a new girlfriend, say compliments to girls. Your attitude to people is a boomerang and they will certainly reciprocate.
8. Don’t look for replacement
It is not easier to cope with a breakup looking for an alternative. In other words, a man tries to find someone who is like his ex, who can fill the void. She was the best and existence without her doesn’t make sense. But thinking in this way, you will never learn to live on and will not be able to open the door to new relationships. Of course, you will find a good and kind woman. Just wait for a while.
9. Get Rid of Excess Energy
Scientists from the University of Ohio found that the very fact of the breakup, like any other stress, stimulates the body to produce an excessive amount of adrenaline - this reaction has come from our ancestors, in case you need to escape from a terrible predator and save your life. But you do not run anywhere, you sit at home and regret yourself: the energy does not find an outlet, provoking a headache and a constant sense of alarm. Take some kind of painkiller (or drink coffee) to get rid of an obsessive headache. As soon as a headache goes away, put on sneakers and go for a run to get rid of excess energy. As a bonus from training, you will get a charge of endorphins and remember what a good mood is.
10. Change your surroundings
You can not stay in one place, you want to call her, start all over again ... "It's all about dopamine - your brain is attached to it and requires a new dose of this "drug " that is produced when you see a loved one," explains the biologist and anthropologist Helen Fisher. It takes time for the body to "regulate" the level of hormones in your new life. In the meantime, you are overexcited and therefore you feel anxiety. But this is fixable. Try to find time in your schedule and go on vacation. Even if it is short - it does not matter. According to a study published in Applied Research in Quality of Life, your body produces "hormones of joy" when you are just planning a vacation. And during the "process" itself, this effect multiplies.
As soon as your brain regulates the normal supply of dopamine (and it takes at least three days, although in some cases it is enough to restore for two days), it will go into a protective mode. Your immune system will weaken. At this time, your body will be vulnerable to infections. You can easily catch a cold. The best way out of this situation is to eat the right, healthy food. Go to the kitchen and bake in the oven home pizza with tomatoes and red onions. For the dough, use whole-grain flour. First, you distract from sad thoughts, and secondly, the quercetin contained in vegetables will strengthen your immunity. For the same purpose, refuel from time to time with grapes, broccoli, and green tea. In addition, a study of the University of Tokushima (Japan) showed that quercetin inhibits the production of cortisol, a stress hormone useful when you need to escape from a predator, but harmful when you are sitting still and doing nothing. You're used to being alone. It's time to start communicating with other people.
12. Enjoy ife
"The severance of social connections can lead to a breakdown in the nervous system," warns Breguier Günter Moore, a professor at the University of Amsterdam, who studied the psychological consequences of the severance of relations. Just imagine: no more "one more mug of beer, and I'm going home, okay, honey?". Do what you were happy to do before the relationship began, whether playing video games or devastating bars with friends. Feel the taste of freedom and the pain of the breakup will finally disappear.
“Scars” after a breakup will remain in your heart even after many years. But know that it's never too late to heal your soul and just turn to another road, and start from scratch.