Social networks are full of beautiful pictures that create the illusion that all people around have perfect relationships. But is it true? However, if you deprive yourself of the pleasure of spying on someone else's beautiful life for a few days, you will realize that in real life nothing happens smoothly. But what to do when the abyss in a relationship seems too big, and you think about taking a break in a relationship? Should we continue this way or rush in search of a smoother road by trying a relationship break? Sometimes it is better to pause and think carefully. In some cases, a temporary separation can help. How to take a break in a relationship without breaking up and actually make it work – this is what we are going to talk about today.
What Does Taking a Break Mean in a Relationship?
The very interpretation of the concept of love between a man and a woman implies their attraction to each other, the desire to be close. Because otherwise, why should they stay in a relationship? Of course, it also happens that people do not understand what they want, but still let’s suppose that in most cases, we choose our own way to love. And hearts that love one another want to be together all the time. So what can then stand behind the desire of taking a break from a relationship?
Let's be frank, most often, the desire to make a decision about the final separation is usually behind the desire to make a pause in a relationship. You are sure that the relationship has completely become useless, you do not see the future with this person, you have long taken off your rose-colored glasses and no longer want to ignore all the shortcomings, but you are still afraid to take the decisive step, but a temporary separation is not your way out.
Do you doubt whether you have chosen a person to live happily ever after and die one day? Are you afraid that maybe you have not met your person yet? Do you constantly compare your partner with partners of your friends, colleagues, acquaintances and even unfamiliar ladies from Instagram and other social networks? Perhaps you should take a pause and understand yourself and your feelings. Just do not overly delay this thinking process in time.
Do you sincerely hope that taking a break in a long-distance relationship will allow you to restart your relationship and bring back the old romance? Yes, sometimes even a little separation can be beneficial and bring freshness and novelty to your love story. Just do not be mistaken that this pause will be able to solve some deep disagreements, your loved one will suddenly change or abandon addiction. In this case, better read books on psychology, or sign up for a consultation with a family psychologist.
If a desire to sustain a pause in a relationship hides a serious offense on a loved one, then a temporary break will help you calmly and soberly look at the circumstances and decide whether it is worth shedding your tears because of this person.
You have more serious plans for this person
Are you tired of waiting for the offer to tie a knot, and your chosen one stubbornly does not notice your hints and always switches the topic of conversations? Well, all is fair in love and war and, perhaps, a temporary separation will allow your partner to realize what treasure they can lose. Alas, the opposite can happen: having felt the taste of freedom, it will be even harder for them to come up with a proposal.
Not every person can boast of being able to restrain their emotions during a quarrel, and sometimes there can only be an emotional outburst behind the offer to leave. All couples, without exception, occasionally have quarrels and misunderstandings. Are they such a big deal that they make you take a time out?
Does Taking a Break from a Relationship Work?
Let’s answer one simple question. What can a pause in a relationship give you? You understand that the pause in a relationship is rarely taken due to a spontaneous decision. It means that there are problems and disagreements, and parting for a while will not solve them. But a temporary break will allow you to:
- Soberly assess what is happening and rethink the value of relationships.
- Understand what you want and what you expect from this union.
- Think about what is missing in the relationship.
- See ways to solve problems.
- Take a look at the situation and understand the behavior of the partner.
- Relax and gain strength.
- Revive sexual interest.
If the purpose of the pause in a relationship doesn’t mean final separation, it would be good to indicate the terms of this separation, then return to the conversation with a partner and discuss further steps, for example, communication during a relationship break.
What are the advantages of a pause in a relationship and is taking a break in a relationship good?
It gives you time to calm down and think. Of course, at the moment you try to get things off your chest and shout everything you have been hiding, it is difficult to understand anything at all. To solve the problem, you need to calm down and weigh everything well. Sometimes temporary separation helps both partners realize their mistakes and forgive each other. It will teach you how to deal with taking a break in a relationship and become stronger.
It will help you take the next steps. When the partners feel that they can lose you, something changes in their mind, and they will be ready to put a whole world at your feet. Most often, they are just afraid of losing everything they have got used to. Or they reflect on how much you still haven't experienced together. Most likely, it will work, but be prepared for any outcome. What if you have overestimated their love for you? In any case, start by reading this article.
Checking the feelings. If you are not sure about your love, you can check it out in this way. A faithful and loving person who agrees to a time out will be waiting for you. And the one who only pretends to love will run away. So you will see the truth, and you can also consider taking a break from a relationship to find yourself.
You will start missing each other. If you disperse and realize that you are very bored, then the game is not over yet and should work on your love. And if you quickly cool down and begin to forget each other, then the final breakup will not be a tragedy for you.
Consider Also Possible Sad Consequences of a Pause in a Relationship
The problem gets worse. The problem lies right in front of you. It is necessary to solve it but not to run from it! In addition, such an offer can hurt your partner very painfully and make matters worse.
The gap between you will become larger. At the time of parting everyone will go their own way, focus on their lives and their problems. Feel like something is missing? Maybe you just feel nostalgic for the "we" concept in your life now. Everything for the sake of which people essentially enters into relationships, during such pauses goes away.
The possibility that you will be cheated on. Treason is a good reason for a complete breakup. And by putting your relationship on pause, you give yourself and your partner an ace in the hole for infidelity.
No one wants to take responsibility and take the first step. This happens when the pause lasts a long time, and the problems in the couple did not allow you to take the initiative. And now the ex-lovers are both so proud that no one simply wants to take the first step towards reunion.
In the end, you can just break up. We all think about a pause the way that it will be followed by the reunion over time. But you can change your mind. You come back, and no one is waiting for you. It will be very painful.
How Long Should a Relationship Break Be?
How long should a break in a relationship last? It is always up to you. Maybe it will only take a week, maybe a month or even a year. It all depends on how soon you recover and regain inner harmony. Do not get back together until you are fully ready. What to do during a break in a relationship? That's up to you too. You can change jobs, find a new hobby, go on a trip, read books from your home library, etc. Now you have time for all the things you didn’t have time to do. This will help you improve self-esteem, re-love yourself and learn to look at the world from a positive side.
When to end a pause? When you fully recharge your batteries and notice positive signs from your partner, you will understand everything. This will come naturally. Then you will be ready to build love again.
Taking a Break in a Relationship: How to Make It Work
Not only taking a pause is a hard decision to make, but it also requires cooperation and a great discussion of both partners. It is a complicated process, but there are some tips on how to make it easier. There are the main taking a break in a relationship rules.
Select the appropriate time. It is not clever to take such a serious decision when they have a work overload or get over problems with their relatives. Go to your beloved one with such an offer at a time when they are calm and happy with life, this will alleviate the situation.
Eloquently and calmly explain your position. In no case make this decision without their participation. Call your lover to talk and calmly explain the reasons for your decision. Make it clear that for you, this is the only way out at the moment, and you are not going to leave them forever. Listen carefully to their position and meet each other halfway. Discuss all conditions in advance. Discuss deadlines. Decide that after the appointed time you will meet and share thoughts about what is happening. Agree that during this period, none of you will try to make a new love, everyone will try to find a solution to your problems. Also, agree on whether you will communicate during the break and how often.
Carry out your promises. This means that you make a decision, and then really follow everything you said. If you start to change your mind 100 times, cheat, pack your things and run away, your partner will never take you and your decisions seriously.
Do not be fooled by the temptations. Most likely, during such a pause, fate will begin to seduce you and show that there is plenty of fish in the sea. Do not give in! At least until the end of the break. If you feel a strong craving for physical love, break up the existing relationship first.
Listen to yourself. Take time for yourself. When you are completely alone you can listen to your inner voice. Your gut intuition. At first, you may be said about staying alone in an empty apartment, but this is how you will find all the answers. Face your inner questions, honestly ask yourself, "Do you need your partner? What can be done to improve your relationship? Do you feel the lack of their attention, care, and affection?" If your answer is negative, then you neither need anything from them, nor they give you anything, and maybe you should finally break up.