I recently spoke with a friend of mine, who was from Russia, but is now making her life in France.

She had a very financially rewarding job in Moscow, working in real estate. However, as a very beautiful woman, tall, dark hair, slim, with large breast, she was often objectified by the men she dealt with. She accepted this and was willing to provide sexual favours to benefit from these relationships, to secure large bonuses and to retain the support of her management team.

Her intention was always to earn enough to leave for Western Europe, or USA to work there, hopefully for herself, when she wouldn't be forced to do business on her back or knees.

This changed with the war in Ukraine. She couldn't accept that her relatives and friends in Ukraine were now being considered lesser people by Putin and his allies and she became vocal in her displeasure. This resulted in immediate issues. Her boss warned her to "shut her fucking mouth" and that no matter what he felt, if she carried on, she would be fired. 

Her landlord, a personal friend, arrived at her apartment and said he heard of her views, as did the neighbours, he struck her and warned her that she needed to shut up...or she needed to leave.

Eventually, she was arrested. After arriving at the station, she was interviewed, during this she was raped by two officers. When her lawyer arrived, she was still handcuffed to the table, with her skirt lifted and panties around her ankles. She was given permission to leave the station, but had to return the following day to the station to leave her passport. When she returned, the officers made comments and others told her they would be coming to visit her soon. True to their words, she saw police come to her apartment. She heard them beating at the door while she hid under her bed. She heard them shout through the door what they would do to her...and that they would be back.

Realising that she had no choice, she packed 2 bags and left for family in Belarus. Through friends, she was able to get a second passport and made it through the border with little problem. She kept herself covered at all times, hiding her beauty and face, for fear that she was being chased. After 3 weeks in Belarus, she escaped to Turkey, but not without having to give gratitude to the men who helped her. A distant uncle in Belarus had demanded sex regularly since she arrived and enjoyed to humiliate her. He arranged a contact to meet her in Turkey and even made her suck him on the way to the airport.

In Turkey, she was provided with a small apartment. Payment for this was to provide sex to a group of 4 men, who visited her almost daily for 2 weeks. She escaped in the early hours, leaving for another part of Turkey before travelling into Europe. She finally made it to Cannes, where a friend of mine had an apartment for her to use.

She called me when this happened and thanked me and my friend for being the first men not to demand sex...she laughed at this, I think in an attempt to hide the sorrow. My friend and his wife visited her often and she quickly began to enjoy life in France, but remained worried that she would be found.

I know the past 12 months have been hard for her. Moving to various cities and at times, she has still experienced some abuse, but she seems to finally be settled and have a good job. 

We spoke for a while, I asked her a simple question...was it worth it? She replied simply...yes, she couldn't remain silent, knowing what the people of Ukraine were experiencing. Although she has been humiliated, abused and attacked, she realises that she is now safe. Something that still many in Ukraine cannot say. I asked how she felt about the men who abused her...and she said she felt anger, disgust and sorrow...not for her, but for them. As men treating women like this can never really be considered men.

I surprised her with a gift hamper a few days after my call...I wanted to show her how proud I am of her and also remind her of better times. She sent me a beautiful photo, with a large smile and bottle of wine from the hamper.

I share this to ask what would you do to speak out against evil? To remind us that many people in Russia do not want Putin's war...and that violence is given to them also. To question, if you knew this would be what you would need to experience, the violence, the sexual treatment...would you hide under your bed? Would you continue to shout against evil?

As for my friend...I'm proud to know her and know her life will be much better now.